Entertainment

Reviews: Hansel and Gretel, Parker

Friday, January 25, 2013

The studio releasing "Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters" was so ashamed of the movie critics weren't allowed to see it until last night and having suffered through a screening of this worthless piece of trash I can certainly understand why those involved were so embarrassed by it.

We're not supposed to take all this campy violence seriously, but the movie plays more stupid than funny and seeing it on a big I-Max screen in 3-D makes a bad movie worse by exaggerating its flaws.

The brother and sister from the fairy tale have been re-imagined as witch hunters looking to find lost children, captured and held by Famke Jannssen.

"Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters" has sat on the shelf for a year while the studio figured out a good time to dump it on an unsuspecting public.

Jeremy Renner has become a big star since he made this movie so he's earned the right to be free of a movie like this, which for an actor and an audience is a form of imprisonment.

Parker

Jason Stratham is "Parker" - a crook with principals out for revenge against business associates who are even more unscrupulous than he is. Jennifer Lopez plays a real estate agent desperate to earn her 1st commission in tony Palm Beach.

I've liked his previous movies and underneath her J-Lo persona is a compelling actress. There are flashes of brilliance here, but both of them are trapped caught in a bad movie with not enough action and an adventure that too often makes no sense.

How bad is "Parker"? The studio releasing it gave us just two clips. I guess they figured the less said or shown about it, the better.

Another movie, a series of gags featuring celebrities like Hugh Jackman and Richard Gere, is apparently so bad the studio releasing "Movie 43" didn't want to show it to me.

---
With the nominee announcements released, Oscar.com is inviting the public to play My Picks, an interactive and social Oscar ballot that allows users to pick who they think will win the Oscar in each award category. Fans can see the nominees their Facebook friends have picked to win. During the Oscar telecast, users will be able to compete with their friends to see who made the most accurate picks. The My Picks experience will live on the Oscars.com, the Oscars App, Facebook, ABCNews.com, OTRC.com and gma.yahoo.com." CLICK HERE to play My Picks right now!

More Oscar Online: Oscars.com

---
Get Eyewitness News Delivered

Facebook | Twitter | Newsletters | Text Alerts

(Copyright ©2014 WABC-TV/DT. All Rights Reserved.)

Get more Entertainment »


Tags:
movie, movie review, entertainment, sandy kenyon
blog comments powered by Disqus
Advertisement