Parenting: Finding the right winter hat

January 4, 2011 (WPVI) -- It used to be easy dressing the kid against the winter cold: heavy coat, gloves, scarf and gloves. But these days I'm finding that my 8-year-old wants to look "cool" in the cold.

And what does that mean?

Well, all of a sudden he wants to have a say in the kind of hat he puts on his head. For example, no more hats with Sponge Bob or superheroes on them.

That's not cool.

How about a hat with the logo of his favorite sports teams? Only if their winning he says. Because losing isn't cool.

All of this about a hat.

But what a sobering realization that your child is growing up and developing an ego. Experts will tell you it's natural, as your child's self-awareness continues to develop. All of a sudden they want to have a say in what they put on - especially outerwear. And so wanting to be supportive of his self-awareness (and self-esteem), I agreed to let him choose a winter hat that will not only keep his head and ears warm, but will also look "cool".

At a recent trip to the mall, we visited a hat store and tried on a few. It was one of those experiences that really test a parent's patience!

The hats I hated, he loved and vice versa. But again experts say that's common. Children basically want to look different from their parents and they try to attain this difference in their personal appearance. So if your kid chooses to wear something that's totally absurd to you, remember how we often looked absurd to our own parents back in the day. I know I did at times... especially during the disco craze when silk shirts and bell bottoms were all the rage, but that's another story.

As one expert told me, children for the most part are insecure and are searching for an identity. So be sure to compliment them on their appearance, even if you don't agree with it. Your child may also customize their appearance to match their friends.

Just remember styles come and go and so do winter hats.

Read more Parenting Perspective blogs by visiting the Parenting Channel on 6abc.com.

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rick williams parenting reports, parenting, rick williams

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